Thanksgiving 2014: Please Let’s Not Make This a Tradition!

(Taken from my facebook post on Thanksgiving Day, 2014…slightly revised)

I am often told that my life and family should be documented as a sitcom. Today it was proven. Thanksgiving memory of 2014 that I assure you not ONE person on the face of the earth can share???

My Tween daughter comes in from shoveling the end of our driveway…holding a blue contraption in her hand…odd look on her face.

“I found this in the snow when I was shoveling”

I look at her…and the blue thing…at her….at the blue thing. She’s doing the same to me…and to it…and to me. …More than a minute went by, I am sure.

I struggled for the right words. She is twelve. We are very open and matter of fact about things. ALL things.

The rolodex of descriptive words was spinning through my head. What do we call this? Vibrator…Dildo…Massager…and so on.

“I think it’s a sex toy” I finally said.

“Me, too”.

My first thought was how the heck does she know this…It really wasn’t phallic looking and it took me a second to process what it was…but anyway.

Let’s add more of a twist to this very awkward scenario? It is marked with writing…”property of…” somebody we know. Who does not live in our neighborhood. A peer’s parent. One of her best friend’s Mom. Really???

This leaves many thoughts and questions running around an inquisitive mind. Why? The insignia…A vendetta and “planting” of it?…being pushed around, driveway to driveway…where might it land…? Or maybe from a communal area it mysteriously escaped from?…WHERE WOULD YOU NEED TO PERSONALIZE IT??!!

It made for some interesting conversations I wasn’t expecting on having that day…and for many days that followed.

Happy Holidays.

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